in winter

well the lake is pretty
but i can’t swim in it
i am not coming back in the summer
i don’t really know what to think about that
well i have always
hated this place
but thats hard to explain
and i’d rather not talk about it
well right now
i am really missing
my baby a lot
ah man
cold turkey
well i know that
i have to enjoy my time here now
so i am trying but when i try to sleep
and i am laying in bed all alone and all time zone confused
thats when it really hits me-real hard
anyway internet is my relief
i can talk to him here
 and i can write about it here
for a lot of people i don’t know to read
oh its confusing
to have two “homes”
and i haven’t even grown up in either of them
i don’t even know what i want in my future
but i like it
heh thats from a song
about being 18
i guess thats what its like
well i don’t know if i like it
but it doesn’t bother me all the time
i mean it’s life and life is great
whatever i don’t even know what to say